Rantopolis

Guy tries to pay with million dollar bill

This actually happened on December 31st, but it’s taken me this long to stop laughing.

The obvious point is that a person that actually has access to a million dollars is not likely to be caught dead in Wal-Mart.  Unless, of course they are part of Sam Walton’s family and have shown up in an armored vehicle to pick up that day’s receipts.

This place scares me.

Secondly, everyone knows not to give a cashier an abnormally large bill for a small purchase.  (Dude…seriously?!  A million dollar bill for a $467 purchase?  That’s like giving someone a $1,000 bill for a 46 cent purchase.)  Way rude.

That kind of shit will get you bitch slapped by the cashier.  And “dirty-looked” by everyone else standing behind you in line.  Maybe even shot at in the parking lot.  Here’s hoping.

Have you seen the people who shop at Wal-Mart?  If they stampede your ass you will turn into ground meat in no time.  Those people don’t play.  (And spandex is their favorite fabric.  Just in case you didn’t know.)

And what did that asshat attempt to purchase with his million dollar bill?  A vacuum cleaner, a microwave and some other stuff.  (Please tell me I don’t actually have to point out that there is no such thing as a one million dollar bill.  Okay.  Good.  The largest U.S. bill currently in circulation carries a charming portrait of Mr. Franklin.)

Dude?!  Seriously?!  No guns??  No bulk toilet paper?  No house dresses for your woman?  What the hell kind of Wal-Mart shopper are you?  (Are you sure you didn’t mean to hit up the Best Buy?  Just think of the reward points you just walked away from.)

For years Wal-Mart was banned from opening a store within the Chicago city limits.  Yet another sign of intelligence from the Windy City.  (That, and the ability of our dead people to vote.)

Categories: Idiots at the store , Just plain weird , What is wrong with you?

2 comments

1 Irene { 01.04.12 at 10:48 pm }

That “Asshat” shall be a warning to all! Wal-mart was banned from Chi-town for years? Yet another reason to be proud of my hometown!!

2 Sally { 01.16.12 at 10:31 pm }

Cool blog!