Rantopolis

Spinning out of control

I know it’s a little lame, but that’s what just popped into my head regarding my experience at spinning class earlier in the day.

Who knew that I would actually look forward to my biweekly visits to the spinning torture chamber.  But along with the high I get from the workout, other forces can be at play which drive me a little crazy.

Here’s what happened during today’s class.

1.  I threw my stuff in front of one of the stationery bikes and proceeded to make the adjustments to the seat, handlebars, etc.  It took a couple of minutes to make sure everything was positioned so that I could have a great ride.  I clipped myself into the pedals and started to warm up.

That’s when it became obvious that the tuberculosis queen was biking next to me.  Sniffle, sniffle, hack, hack.  Repeatedly.  I turned and said…”Oh, you have a cold? ” “Yes,” she replied.  “But I’m sure I am not contagious.”

Great.  Not only is she spreading a virus.  It’s clearly affected her brain and she is delusional.  I’m sure I am now incubating ebola.

2.  In the middle of the class, I suddenly find myself being gassed to death.  Someone’s anal cavity was pumping out vast quantities of methane.  In layman’s terms, someone had turned farting into an Olympic sport.   Seriously, people.  Put a cork in it.  Or avoid having beans for breakfast if you are going to be cycling during lunch.

3.  Towards the end of the class, during a particularly difficult hill climb, a guy started barking.  Yes, barking.  I thought to myself, sweet Jesus.  First there’s Typhoid Mary, then we have the Flatulence King and now we have Dog Boy.

On the positive side, the instructor played two Prince songs during the ride.  The circumstances put new meaning into “I will die 4 u.”

Categories: Exercise torture , Gross factor

4 comments

1 Bitch3 { 10.18.11 at 8:41 pm }

Omg!!! We r def separated at birth!!!

2 Sophia { 10.18.11 at 8:43 pm }

LOL.

3 BigFoot { 10.18.11 at 9:19 pm }

Savages.

4 Suzanne { 10.18.11 at 11:17 pm }

I am so glad I work out at home where all this stuff may or may not happen but if it does or doesn’t no one knows a thing.